The Witless Protection Program


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Today we’re heading to Manhattan to eat some free samples at Marjan’s Cakes and Desserts, but wait, put that macaron down because there’s a mystery afoot in The Witless Protection Program by Maria DiRico.

About The Witless Protection Program


The Witless Protection Program (A Catering Hall Mystery)
Cozy Mystery
5th in Series
Setting – New York
Kensington Cozies (March 26, 2024)
Mass Market Paperback ‏ : ‎ 304 pages
ISBN-10 ‏ : ‎ 1496744624
ISBN-13 ‏ : ‎ 978-1496744623
Digital ASIN ‏ : ‎ B0C9W8W668

Mia Carina has steered her Italian-American family’s Astoria, Queens, catering hall, Belle View Banquet Manor, into becoming the borough’s premiere party site, and nothing could make her happier—except her boyfriend proposing. There’s just one presumed-dead obstacle in the way . . .

A strong, independent woman and respected entrepreneur, Mia never imagined she’d pine for a marriage proposal. Yet lately, with her beloved Shane, she’s on tenterhooks. It’s especially surprising, considering Mia’s first husband, Adam, was a philandering grifter, assumed lost-at-sea after a boating disaster. But everyone knows what happens when you assume . . .

While working a huge wedding expo in Manhattan, Mia is shocked to spot the man who nearly destroyed her life. The one who’s supposed to be sleeping with the fishes. But she loses him in the crowd. And when it happens again the next day, it’s time for an emergency meeting with the family—and the Family. Because if Adam is alive, Mia is still married . . .

Everyone wants Adam dead. Everyone except Mia. She’s dealt with enough police for a lifetime. Mia needs to be a divorcée, not a widow. But someone out there disagrees, and if Mia doesn’t discover who, she may never be free to marry Shane—or anyone else . . .

Italian recipes included!

Excerpt

On the way back to the Belle View exhibit, Mia passed Marjan’s Cakes and Desserts, a bakery she’d used in the past to glowing reviewers from customers. She and Marjan, a lovely émigré from London, exchanged greetings. “Anything new and exciting in the wedding cake world?” Mia asked.
“We’re doing a lot of displays instead of cakes lately,” Marjan said. “You know, like tiers of different-flavored macarons. For cakes with multiple layers, a lot of couples want a different flavor with each layer. And since carrot cake feels dated, I’ve created a ginger spice alternative. Try it.” The baker pointed to small, frosted squares in paper cups.
“You don’t have to tell me twice.” Mia picked up a sample and took a bite. “OMG, Marjan, this is fabulous. So much better than boring old carrot cake.” She polished off the sample and took another. “I love how the frosting is a blend of spices. Yum.” She spoke with her mouth full as she inhaled a second sample. “I’d hire you for my own wedding, but it looks like it’ll take some kind of divine intervention for Shane to put a ring on it.”
“I’m sorry to hear that.” Mia reached for a third sample. “But if you don’t mind leaving some samples for potentially paying customers…”
Mia retracted her hand. “Right. Got it.”
She continued her wander back to the Belle View display, casting a disconsolate glance at the bridal gowns on parade as part of a runway show. An ear-splitting screech of joy distracted her. She craned her neck to see who released it. A tall blonde she pegged to be around twenty-five jumped up and down as she pointed to a particularly elaborate sequined, beaded, and rhinestoned bridal gown. She let out another screech. “Ahh! That’s it! That’s the gown I told you about, baby! The one I wanna get married in! It’s so bee-you-tee-ful! I’m dying!”
The “baby” in question, a man about the same height as the bride-to-be, turned to see the dress. He locked eyes with Mia. A wave of nausea coursed through her. For a moment, she thought she’d pass out.
The Miami police presumed her husband was lost at sea. Mia took great comfort from knowing her cheating spouse literally slept with the fishes. But in an instant, what she’d long feared had come true.
Adam Grosso didn’t sleep with the fishes. He wasn’t dead. He was there. At the bridal expo.
And Mia was staring at him.
Mia stood frozen in place, locked in a staring contest with the man who’d come close to destroying her life. She’d spent months after his disappearance in Miami PD’s crosshairs as their primary person of interest. Given her father’s position as a lieutenant who ran illegal gambling games for the Boldano Family and the occasional incarcerations of her dad and brother Posi Carina – who was currently finishing a stint at the Triborough Correctional Facility for indulging in his illegal habit of stealing luxury sports cars — Mia found herself enduring the kind of notoriety usually trained on celebrities. Public interest in her eventually faded but left her battle-scarred, to say nothing of the emotional toll her relationship with Adam had taken on her. But finally, almost two years later, Mia’s life was on track. A great job. A nice home in Astoria she shared with her grandmother Elisabetta. And a boyfriend who would hopefully propose to her before senile dementia set in for one or both of them.
But now, this. This!

About Maria DiRico

Maria DiRico is the pseudonym for Ellen Byron, author of the award-winning, USA Today bestselling Cajun Country Mysteries. Born in Queens, New York, she is a first-generation Italian-American on her mother’s side and the granddaughter of a low-level Jewish mobster on her father’s side. She grew up visiting the Astoria Manor and Grand Bay Marina catering halls, which were run by her Italian mother’s family in Queens and have become the inspiration for her Catering Hall Mystery Series. DiRico has been a writer-producer for hit television series like Wings and Just Shoot Me, and her first play, Graceland, appears in the Best Short Plays collection. She’s a freelance journalist, with over 200 articles published in national magazines, and previously worked as a cater-waiter for Martha Stewart, a credit she never tires of sharing. A native New Yorker who attended Tulane University, Ellen lives in Los Angeles with her husband, daughter, and two rescue dogs.

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